Getting stronger

Matthew 18:19  Agree with someone for your healing “Again I say to you that if two of you agree on earth concerning anything that they ask, it will be done for them by My Father in heaven.”

I have a big list of healing scriptures from the bible.  Everything in the bible is true.  You can’t take a verse out of the bible and say that doesn’t apply to us, because God carefully chose every word in the bible.  If something is written in the bible over and over again, just maybe God really wants us to hear and understand.  He wants us to follow him and he will bless us beyond our comprehension.

My dad is doing much better today.  He’s been moved out of ICU and into a regular room. He recieved another pint of blood and could probably go home, but the doctors are keeping him at the hospital until they KNOW he’s ready to go home.  There’s no need for more middle of the night ER visit’s.

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A slight setback

This morning at around 1:30 a.m., my brother, Wayne received a call from my mom asking to come help get my dad into the car so that we could take him back to the hospital.  He was doing so well.  Yesterday he was walking all around the house without a walker, but my mom had mentioned that he was freezing cold.  I didn’t really worry too much because he IS going through chemotherapy and there are quite a few side effects.  As long as he was moving and eating, and had good color, I was happy.

He has a urinary tract infection and I know it can hit older people pretty hard.  They admitted him back to ICU and from what I hear my dad is not a happy person.  He’s been in the hospital this whole month and just wants to be in the comforts of his own home.  I wouldn’t worry about his UTI; this afternoon his blood pressure dropped from 110 to 70 instantly.  That’s what we’re all concerned about.  Somehow we have to get his blood pressure regulated.  We can’t take care of him at home like this and he can’t stay in the hospital for 5 months while he’s getting treatment either.

The good news is, he has the best doctors and they will work out his treatment to where it’s tolerable and still save his life.  This is just a huge bump in the road, one that we will get through, but I wish we didn’t have to.  We all know that God is with us but we want our dad well again.

I don’t think they’re planning on keeping him in the hospital long this time.  They want him to come back home in a couple of days.

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Dad is home!

My dad is home safe and sound!  Yesterday he walked all over the hospital.  The doctors couldn’t believe how quickly he bounced back.  One doctor even commented that he didn’t think he would make it out of the hospital!  I guess that doctor doesn’t know my dad or our God. 

Since he’s been home, he’s walked quite a bit.  He’s taken a bath and even shaved.  We just got to get him eating more so he can put meat on his bones.  He lost 40 pounds before his diagnosis because it hurt to eat.  He’s been in the hospital for about 3 weeks so I know he’s lost even more.  He’s a skinny dad right now. The good news is he hasn’t been nauseous at all.  His next chemo round will be in 2 weeks.  I’m pretty positive it will not be so bad.  At least we know the chemo is doing it’s job. The blood loss was from the tumor breaking up.

Thank you so much everyone for all the prayers.  Keep them coming!

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A turn for the better!

Dad is doing very well today.  I came in and he was sitting on his bed reading.  He hasn’t been able to do that for a while so it made me very happy.  Shortly after, the nursing staff sat him in the chair, dad cleaned himself up, then he went for a little walk around the room. 

Today he will be moved back to a regular room and more than likely will go home on Friday.  I’m pretty sure the worse is over.  He will not require surgery.  This first round of chemo through the tumor through a loop.  The majority of the shrinkage comes from the first chemo treatment.  That’s why dad lost so much blood so fast.  Today he’s been eating soft food with no trouble.

Thanks so much to everyone for the prayers.  He has so many people that love him so much.

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cancer and the attitude

Unfortunately we can’t always see the positive side of cancer because it is such a horrible disease.  Even though we know we can be cured, the process is pretty horrific.  We all handle our emotions differently and sometimes strangers can make us feel better than the people we love the most.  Nobody can imagine the emotional side until that person goes through it themselves.  My father has been so down in the dumps with his health for so many months now that he’s about at his end.  He tries to be really positive and nice to people, but he’s weak and uncomfortable and scared.  Yesterday he looked really good and had an upbeat attitude, today is really difficult.  It’s hard on me because I want him to fight, but he should also have the right to grief and be sad.  We have to let him deal with this his own way and just be there for him and love him.

I really wanted to use this website so people could follow my journey, but since I was too weak, I want to share my fathers journey through my eyes.  Cancer is not pretty, it’s hard on everyone.  People need to know that it’s usually not a death sentence even though it can be tough.  It’s a battle and those who survive usually have a stronger love for life than ever before.

My dad is still bleeding internally and will more than likely need surgery.  The cancer is getting broke down by the chemo and it seems that it broke through the intestinal wall.  He has been on blood thinners for his heart, so he will need to be on the blood thinners for a while before he can have the surgery.  Meanwhile, he is malnourished so he will be receiving food through a picc line.

Please pray for positive strength for my father.  We all need him around for a lot more years and that is what he will need to survive this ordeal.

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My dad – day 3

Philippians 4:13 I am able to do all things through the one who strengthens me.

It’s funny how this verse has been floating around in my head for days now and today it just happens to be the verse of the day on YouVersion.  I thought it would be a very fitting verse to show today.  We all get caught up in our daily lives and routine and life is always throwing us a curve ball.  After everything that I have been through with cancer, I feel like I will combat it all and live a long healthy life as long as I take care of myself.  What do you do when one of your parents develops cancer and you know what it’s like.  Its the one thing I never wanted my parents to go through, but it’s amazing how when it happens, youre suddenly strong enough to handle it all.  I think God is amazing and I can’t imagine how people get through their lives without God.

I think my dad has the best family and friends in the world.  So many people all over the world are praying for him.  Not just in America, people in Mexico, El Salvador……. we have so much to be thankful for.  My dad is the nicest, sweetest man I have ever met.  I felt so bad when he was in the ER Friday night and the nurse were poking him over and over and not able to pull his blood.  He just laid there without a peep but you knew just how miserable he was. 

My dad is bleeding internally but we don’t know yet if it’s the tumor breaking apart, if he has a hole in his intestines, or if it’s just the chemo zapping his blood count. So far he’s received 6 pints of blood, his color is looking really good.  The doctors think he will be removed from ICU today so that’s great news. If I know more later today, I’ll come back and post updates.

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My dad – 2

Proverbs 17:22  A cheerful heart brings good healing, but a crushed spirit dries up the bones.

It is good that you recognize your weakness.  That keeps you looking to Me, your Strength.  Abundant life is not necessarily health and wealth; it is living in continual dependence on Me.  Instead of trying to fit this day into a preconceived mold, relax and be on the lookout for what I am doing.  This mind-set will free you to enjoy Me and to find what I have planned for you to do.  This is far better than trying to make things go according to your own plan. –Sara Young author of Jesus calling.

Now that I’ve experienced cancer for myself, twice; I am now experiencing the side of the loved one.  When I was going through cancer I was in control of my own outlook and I learned to accept it and it totally changed the way I look at life.  Life is a gift that we all take advantage of.  Everyday is precious and I’m so thankful for this life of living for God.  It’s amazing when you take your focus off yourself and switch your  focus on God how much easier it is to be at peace and realize that there are a lot of bumps in the road.  The bad things in life are just opportunities for something better happen.  Where there is sorrow, joy is just around the road.

I’m now dealing with my father who was just diagnosed with cancer and I see the hard time he is going through.  I just want to make everything ok for him.  He’s going through the hardest time of his life right now. He will be ok though once he gets through the bumps.

Thursday evening at 5:00 he began his first chemo treatment. After a couple of hours he went into anaphylctic shock.  They took him off the chemo for a couple of hours, then started it again at a very low dose for 10 more hours.  A couple of hours later they sent him home from the hospital.  At about 9:30 last night we had to call the paramedics to take him to the hospital because he couldn’t walk, he was panting for air when he tried, as well as being disoriented.  He is back in Swedish hospital in ICU.  It may be that the cancer attached to the intestinal wall and now the chemo is ripping it apart.

I know my dad is going to be just fine.  Knowing what I went through in the beginning and just trying to comprehend everything, I know he’s going through the same thing.  The good thing is, he has so many people that love him and people praying for him all over the world. I’m so glad that my dad has the greatest doctor and is getting the best possible treatment and care.  We have a lot to be thankful for.




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my dad

I’m feeling much better today because the doctor came in and told us that my dad has large cell lymphoma which is mostly found in older people and is very treatable with a high cure rate.  He didn’t tell us that he thinks my dad can be cured, because today was the day of testing for the stage of the cancer.  Once the doctor knows the stage and has a good idea of what my dad’s body can take, then he will have a better idea if this is curable, or rather treatment to put him in remission.  We will have the answers tomorrow and more than likely he will also begin chemotherapy tomorrow as well.  He will be getting rituxan I believe it’s called which is much more mild than the cisplatin that I received.  He will also probably be getting steroids for 5 days after the rituxan IV drip which will last about 5 hours.  His treatment will consist of 6 rounds of chemo, 28 day cycles.  So in other words, 6 months of treatment.  Thankfully he will not need surgery or radiation.

I’m feeling pretty good about all this now, because my dad is already so weak and sick.  Chemo is miserable but he will start getting back to his old self when it’s all over with.

Last night I was trying to figure out how I was going to deal with all of this and keep myself healthy at the same time.  Then God brought me back to focus on him and I understood that it’s just another one of life’s obstacles.  Everything is going to work out and it’s in Gods hands.  The doctor today told us that he was not the doctor, he’s the doctors assistant with the real doctor being God.  I really loved that he said that. 

I don’t have memory verses right now because I haven’t had the chance to study.  Thanks for all your prayers!

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living – day 17

Today I found out that my dad has lymphoma.  He’s been suffering for months now going  from doctor to doctor.  The doctors pinpointed his problem as acid reflux and was told he would need surgery to fix the problem, but he wouldn’t be able to have the surgery until his heart doctor released him since he just had a stint put in his heart a few months ago.  My dad keeps complaining and complaining to the point that he told one doctor if he can’t have the surgery until May, he will be dead by then.  The doctors just laugh thinking he’s just a funny old man.  I know my dad and I knew something else was wrong.  Finally he got so bad a couple of Sunday’s ago that my mom called my brother to come and help her take him to the emergency room.  My dad’s been at Swedish hospital for over a week and today while I was there, one of the doctors came in and told us that he had lymphoma.  That’s absolutely all that I know until tomorrow.  It was very hard to diagnose because it’s deep down into his intestines.

If anyone reads this, please pray for my dads mental state of mind.  He has rapidly been going down hill mentally as well as physically since early this fall.  I love my dad more than anything and I can’t stand that this is happening to him.

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Living – Day 16

We are now a week into March 2013.  Time is just going by way too fast.  Next month, April 3rd I will have my 6 month check up to make sure the cancer is still gone.  The purpose of me memorizing all these verses is so that I am strong and keep my faith high to make sure the cancer doesn’t come back.

James 1:6 But let him ask in faith not wavering.  For he that waverith is like a wave of the sea driven with the wind and tossed.

I would like to emphasize ‘not wavering’.  Faith is so extremely important.  Unwavering faith is spoken of all throughout the bible.  There really must be something to it.

I’m finding that this week stress has been really building up inside of me and I do not at all like that feeling.  I can feel myself taking out my frustrations on people.  This morning I just really meditated on God and I all of a sudden feel so much better.

My father has been in the hospital all week, something is wrong with him and they still don’t know what it is, then next month I have my cat scan and I think without realizing it, stress has been brewing inside of me and nothing good ever comes from it.  This is the month to really focus on God and build my faith more than ever.

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